How to Celebrate Leap Day as a Twenty Something

It's a few minutes past 9am on a Sunday morning and I am sitting at work. I don't usually work weekends, actually I never work weekends, but I made a promise to live my life more for me in 2016, and it turns out me likes to do fun things, and fun things require money. So I'm sitting at work at 9am on a Sunday morning.



Today is a leap day which I find very exciting, and I know it happens every four years, but how awesome is it that every four years we just get an extra day to live? I know calendars are man made and we aren't really getting anything "extra" but let's just enjoy the fact that this year is 366 days long instead of 365. Unfortunately my extra day will be spent at work, because the 29th falls on a Monday (boo). So instead I am celebrating my extra 24 hours this year by committing to something I wouldn't usually do in the future. My celebrating will have to wait because grown ups can't just call off work for no reason other than wanting to enjoy leap day.

Related Post: 10 Ways Working Full Time Changes Your Life

If you are lucky enough to have the day off then I am all for you taking advantage of it, and if not, here are some ways to enjoy the feeling of anything can happen that comes along with leap year, but on a day that's more suitable for you and all your adult responsibilities.

Purchase some concert tickets

Concerts are this thing that we all wanted to attend when we were younger but either didn't have the money or permission to go. Now as twenty somethings we put up excuses like ticket prices or being too tired for a concert on a Wednesday night. Skip a night at the bar and use that money instead for an actual experience, trust me, you won't regret it.

Address your relationship status

Are you unhappy in your current relationship? Do something about it! Every time I think about all the gut feelings I got in my last relationship I get so irritated I didn't just blurt out one time how incredibly unhappy I felt at time. If you're on the other end and can't stand to spend another Friday night without a date, take a step towards changing that. Download an app, ask your friend to set you up or simply strike up a conversation with the next cute person you cross paths with.

Related Post: 20 Honest Reasons Why It's Sometimes Better to Be Single

Book that Groupon you've had your eyes on

I swear I'm not sponsored by Groupon, I just really love how they have so many things you would normally pay full price for at a discount. Treat yourself on this extra day by booking a massage, fancy dinner or an all inclusive trip. It's crazy how inexpensive travelling with a Groupon voucher can be, seriously, look it up. You'll be reconsidering whether or not you have the money to travel after just a few scrolls.

Follow up on your resolutions

We all make new year's resolutions whether we choose to broadcast them over social media or not. With us being only two months into the new year it's not too late to start taking steps towards meeting our goals or checking in to see our progress. I can admit that the past week of work was so busy that I haven't written a single post or replied to any comments or emails, but without taking time to reflect on my slips, I wouldn't know in what areas of my blog I needed to focus on more to continue towards my ultimate goal.

Related Post: 10 Important Resolutions Every Twenty Something Should Make

Do something out of your comfort zone

Jumping out of an airplane is not what I'm implying, unless you're into that sort of thing. What I mean is that you do that thing you always want to but talk yourself out of. We all have a restaurant we want to try to or movie we want to see, but we let the lack of support or enthusiasm from those around us. On Wednesday I am going to a concert alone, to see a band I never head of before a few months ago, with the tickets I bought my now ex-boyfriend. The old me would have sold them or just given them away to avoid going to a rock concert by myself, but I'm trying to live a little more, so I'll be there, a good 10 ft away from any potential mosh pits.



Are you doing anything special for leap day? If so, let me know what you have planned in the comments below!
4

A Letter to My iPhone 4s

Dear iPhone 4s,

Is it weird that I wrote the idea for this post on my new iPhone? The skinnier, shinier, better version of you. Or is the weird part that I feel guilty about it? It's not that I wanted to go out and find something newer and better, but the time had come.



For months everyone told me I could do better, but since they knew nothing about us I brushed off their remarks off as jealousy because they couldn't last as long as we did. You were actually a gift from a boy I briefly dated, a guy who to this day is always chasing after the newest thing to impress people with. His constant need to show off is what led me to decide he wasn't worth sticking with, but along the way he passed you along to me like you were nothing more than a paperweight.

Our time together has captured some of the biggest moments in my twenties. With you I packed up and moved across the country, learned the landscape of this new city, fell in love, and eventually fell out of love. It was on you that my now ex boyfriend first text me hello and you are the only thing that holds the thousands of words passed between us in the year we spent together, the good and the bad.

Related Post: 100 Things to Do Instead of Calling Your Ex-Boyfriend

I didn't want to let you go, which is why I wouldn't dare trade you in, but you just weren't as reliable as you used to be. Standing on the street waiting for the bus is already bad enough, but it's worse when I can't check the time in fear of you shutting down. Your nonexistent battery life made me grow tired of never knowing when you'd call it quits for the day, so after Storm Jonas I started looking elsewhere.

Although I could give you up in exchange for $100 and the guarantee of never having to reread text messages from my former life, I won't. To be perfectly honest, I don't trust this new phone. It's far too fragile and flashy. Every bump in my purse leaves me in fear that it will crack under the pressure, meanwhile I dropped you too many times to count with no hesitation of knowing that you'd be perfectly fine.

Maybe the boy who gave you to me had it right now, maybe it's wrong to grow so attached to people, places and things. Once you do it becomes so much harder to let go, or be let go of. Unfortunately I grow an attachment to everything from my doorman to a hair tie. And I'm going to continue to, because what's the point of anything if you can't hold onto the memories and things of something or someone you once needed?

Enjoy the chaos that is my junk drawer,

Rubi

4

Why Every Twenty Something Needs to Watch How to Be Single

It's currently 8:56pm on a Sunday night. I'm writing this as I lay in bed watching one of the rare episodes of Law and Order SVU that I haven't seen before. Lately all I do is sit in bed or on the floor, anywhere but the white leather couch I was once so excited to purchase. It's the same couch that solidified this apartment becoming my new home, the same couch my then boyfriend and I spent our nights watching TV on, and the same couch that for weeks I scrubbed to rid of the the stain he left behind the night he dropped spaghetti all over the place.

My day today was spent like most, starting and quitting projects to stay busy until eventually I had to head to Chinatown to catch a movie with a girl I'd never met. In an effort to make more friends in this lonely city I joined Meet Up last October but just recently started actively using the site. (More on this later.)

Related Post: 20 Honest Reasons Why It's Sometimes Better to Be Single



The past few weeks have been difficult, with my mind being a rollercoaster of emotions regarding my new status in this city. Single and alone, with no boyfriend to get brunch with and no friends to call on when I need some social support. So today I watched a movie with a stranger, because just for those two hours I could stop thinking about the fact that the boy I loved has found someone new to sit on the couch with, just weeks after he stood on the same corner I exited my Uber today and told me that he no longer loved me, that I bored him.

Entering the theatre my expectations for the film were low. While I knew it would make me laugh I didn't imagine it would impact me the way it did. Exiting the theatre and sitting here now I have a slightly more optimistic view of my current situation, having done nothing more than forking over twelve dollars to watch a movie about a girl trying to find herself. These are the reasons you too need to see it.

Alice, the main character, is average. 

I can hear what you're thinking, why would this be a good thing? Lemme tell you. Every leading lady in films always has something we envy, whether it be an amazing apartment we could never afford or long hair the rest of us could never grow. Alice on the other hand has an average haircut, average looks, and an average job. Nothing about her makes her out of the ordinary which is refreshing in a sea of perfect yet unrealistic leading ladies.

Don't settle for anything less than what you want. 

Lucy is a character in the film who you instantly hate. Her algorithm to find love and need to fall in love and be married is off-putting, maybe because we are all secretly Lucy in the privacy of our thoughts. While all of us may not be looking at wedding gowns before we enter an actual relationship, there's something to be said about a woman who knows what she wants and is willing to sort through a ton of possibilities until she meets the right one.

We are all guilty of falling into the 'dick sand.'

If you've seen the movie, you understand what this term means, if not, I'll give you a brief explanation without spoiling anything. Dick sand is something you fall into and cannot escape (like quicksand) except it applies exclusively to men. If you've ever gotten a hint of attention or praise from a male and suddenly dropped all your priorities, whether they be a paper that's due or love for browsing used book stores on the weekend. We all have given more than we've received at least once, even for the guys who continually give the bare minimum. Don't give up yourself for the idea of who you could be with someone else.

Related Post: 100 Things to Do Instead of Calling Your Ex-Boyfriend

Being single is a choice, not a sentence. 

So many twenty somethings are stuck in an endless cycle of jumping from serious relationship to serious relationship, spending the time in between feeling as if being single is a punishment. Alice's sister, Meg, is a great example of not giving in to this idea. While everyone around her sees her single status and commitment to her career as something to pity, she is content with her choices and is completely in control of her life course. What so many of us don't realize is that being single is 100% up to us, because I guarantee every single one of you reading this could enter any bar/restaurant/gym and walk out with a date. So let's remember how much power we have over our circumstance.

You have to love yourself first. 

Everyone says this, but they say it because it's true. Alice's entire purpose in this film is to discover who she truly is, and it's not until she understand her own wants and needs that she fully starts to enjoy the everyday things we often overlook. I'm not preaching you need to spend years finding yourself, but being comfortable being and doing things on your own is important before committing to being and doing things with someone else exclusively.

You can be surrounded by people and still feel utterly alone. 

Coming from someone who lives in a major city with crowded subways, sidewalks and stores, this could not be any more true. Doing simple things like running to the grocery store or grabbing a coffee can feel so isolating when single, especially when every couple seems to jump out at you. Try to not let the loneliness get to you though. Enjoy the fact you can browse the aisles for as long as you please and visit the coffee shop that's your personal favorite.

Stop talking yourself out of things. 

As someone who is recently out of relationship, I am definitely guilty of this. My weekends often start with high hopes of everything that I will see and do. Then somewhere along the way I convince myself that it probably won't be that great anyways, or worse, it will be weird if I go alone. Instead of convincing yourself of all the reasons you cant or shouldn't, stop those thoughts and take a step towards accomplishing whatever you want to do, however big or small it may be.

Related Post: Lies People Tell You About Being in Your Twenties

Don't waste a moment. 

The film took on the theme that our twenties are a time to experiment, take risks and live each moment to the fullest. While this is great in theory, when you have to be up for work at 8am it can be difficult to treat every day like it's Friday. And to be perfectly honest, most Fridays I'm too exhausted from my week to entertain the idea of going out. Instead, I think we as twenty somethings shouldn't spend a second doing anything that doesn't make us happy. Hate going out? Then don't. Rather not spend your Sundays watching the game with your friends? Get up and go do something else. Instead of making sacrifices to go along with the group or please the person you're with, step back and ask yourself how you rather spend your time.

There's no shame in your relationship status. 

Many of us are guilty of feeling bad for that one friend who is single, but why? When did being single become something to pity, something that we all want to steadily avoid? For a generation that boasts about loving the experience of dating casually and not having to settle down early, we are very defensive when it comes to explaining our choice to be alone. Don't feel bad about being single, it's a relationship status not a medical condition.

Do more for yourself, not others. 

I have a bad habit of only buying cute underwear and attractive clothing when I'm in a relationship. Why do I do this? Because in my mind I have someone to dress up for. A few weeks ago I began to talk myself out of buying a bralette because I figured there would be no one to see it. Then I snapped out of it and remembered I was enough, so I bought the damn thing. In two colors! If you want brunch, go eat it. Who gives a fuck if the restaurant was where you always went with your ex. See a cute bra you like? Buy it and check yourself out every time you pass a mirror. Don't fall for the idea that it's selfish to put yourself first, because it's not, so make yourself your priority.




Have you seen How to Be Single?? What were your thoughts on the film, and if not, what's something you let hold you back due to your relationship status, single or taken!
5

Something to Think About When Nothing Is Going Your Way

Karma is this thing that I always really wanted to believe in but always sounded too good to be true. Like a conditioner that promises to erase seven years’ worth of damage. Like really dude, you’ll fix my split ends and make my hair grow faster? Please take all my money!



Anyways, karma has become this thing lately that I want to believe in unconditionally but my everyday life is making a strong case against. Then 2016 came around, and it was terrible. I mean it was honestly the kind of start to the new year that you see in one of those cheesy romantic comedies about a quirky girl in the city looking for love. 

Not even one full day into the new year and I was dumped on the street in Chinatown, leaving me with absolutely no friends in the city and to top it off I was trying to determine if I was anemic or not. Turns out I wasn’t anemic, but I was heartbroken. Don’t feel too bad for me though, cause after years of wishing for a sign karma finally came through.


You know that guy who broke my heart and moved away? Had I mentioned that he literally put states between us, cause he did. Screw that guy. Well regardless, the same guy that told me I bored him is currently battling a nasty eye infection, has accepted a nonpaying job (which makes it not a job!) and had his identity stolen. Meanwhile I’m making a new friend each week, have never been up for more opportunities at work and my eyebrows have never been more on fleek. A lot of time lately has been dedicated to the things that sit above my eyes. Some girls visit the gym to get that perfect beach body, I just sit in front of the mirror in my pajamas and analyze the curve of my arch.

If you’re like me and are skeptical about things that sound too good to be true, take my experience to motivate you to be a less shitty person. I’m not a religious person but I have always believed that you get what you put out into the universe, and now that I spend my days doing the things I want to do, I’m receiving so much more of the results I once only dreamed of.

For anyone who had 2016 start of terribly or whose resolutions are already starting to fail, pick yourself up and look around. Things could be much, much worse. You could be a 29 year old man with an eye infection, volunteering, and a case of identity theft.



How do you deal with being stuck with your own negative thoughts? Plus, how is everyone doing on their resolutions? Or have we all secretly given up on those by now?
2

The Best 5 Websites to Find Your Next Job Now!

Since you clicked on this article I'm gonna take a wild guess and assume you're looking for a job. Hopefully you are currently employed and wanting to transition to a better position, or like so many others, you're unemployed and getting to the point of being willing to take any job.

I graduated college with no freaking clue of what the next few months were going to have in store for me. I would have never imagined I'd be living at home for two months before making the spontaneous decision to attend grad school and move across the country. Did I mention I had absolutely no money or clue of where my next paycheck was going to come from?



My impending rent bill gave me the motivation I needed to start looking for a job, and thanks to the resources available through my university, my job search lasted no longer than one month before I was employed full time at a nonprofit in the city. While I can't give you years worth of experience or write your resume for you (even though I have some tips), I can push you towards the job search websites that are most up to date and used most often by companies who are actively looking to hire new employees.

Monster.com

Monster earned it's spot on this list because as one of the most well known job search engine sites employers are more likely to use this website over others that are just starting out. On top of posting available jobs in your area, Monster offers additional services such as resume examples, cover letter tips and salary information. For someone who is unsure of how to tailor a cover letter or what their salary requirements should be, Monster gathers all the information you could need before submitting your application.

Related Post: 6 Popular Resume Mistakes to Avoid

Idealist.org

If you live in a major city like New York or San Francisco, you shouldn't be skipping Idealist when looking for a new job. Unlike the other job search websites, Idealist focuses on posting volunteer, internship and employment opportunities with nonprofits exclusively. Through my experience, organizations who post on Idealist are more responsive to job applications. In the span of one week, I had three separate job interviews for positions I found through Idealist that very same week!

ZipRecruiter.com

Zip Recruiter is like most other job search websites except they've taken every step possible to make applying to jobs as seamless as possible. What I specifically enjoyed about this website though was that they went the extra step and emailed you available openings similar to the ones you were searching, with basically cuts your work in half! For someone who is trying to apply to as many jobs as possible without spending hours doing a job search, Zip Recruiter is the site for you.

CareerBuilder.com

This website is pretty straightforward, and while I don't find their extra resources helpful, their website is easy to navigate and often updated. My biggest pet peeve about using job search engine websites is when the job opportunities listed are through hiring agencies. I much prefer to apply directly with a company, which is why Career Builder is a better alternative to other websites.

Related Post: 8 Popular Reasons You Weren't Called for an Interview

Indeed.com

Even though Indeed is an eye sore, it's one of the most popular job posting websites across the board. It takes time to get used to but with so many employers turning to this well know website, it's worth getting used to. My advice is to skip past the listings that are posted by temp agencies and recruiters and instead apply with companies directly. Also, if a job posting is more than two weeks old chances are there is a small likelihood of your application being seen, simply because so many people have had the chance to see and apply for the job opportunity.

For more career tips and advice for twenty something, follow my Pinterest board dedicated to resume, cover letter and interview tips!!

Follow When Life Gives You Rubi's board CAREER TIPS & ADVICE FOR 20 SOMETHINGS on Pinterest.


What is your favorite website to find job postings? Are you like me and prefer sites that are easy to use and navigate?

5

How to Deal With Negative People In 5 Steps

About five years ago I made a conscious effort to spend less time following the details of celebrity lives and focus more on enjoying my own. At that time my roommates and I would pass hours on the couch with the Kardashians, spend our money on tabloids full of lies and wonder how they could pull of always being on their way somewhere. Right around that time was when I was preparing to start my application process to study abroad, which ultimately led to me being more committed to enjoying every moment of my day rather than trying to figure out what a celebrity was doing with theirs.

I'm not perfect though and I do have my moments of wanting to stay in the loop, and thanks to websites like Buzzfeed I no longer have to buy People magazine to get my celebrity news. As a big fan of Taylor Swift I do my best to keep up with her life without losing any time of my own, which is why her speech at this year's Grammys hit a chord with me.



As someone who understands why she reacts the way she does regarding the words people say about her, I was beyond proud when she used that historic moment to address the controversy surrounding this weekend with class. I sat in bed prepared to hear her thank her fans and family. What I got instead was a glimpse of the woman we've always wanted to see, someone who could put on a smile, throw a punch back, yet still walk away with everyone on her side. 

While the drama in my life isn't as big of deal as that of Taylor Swift's, I like many young women can relate with having to deal with negative people in my life. Whether partners, friends or strangers, everyone starts to gain an opinion about your decisions once good things start happening. Taking a note from Taylor's book I've decided to stay away from my normal method of dealing with haters (which usually consists of  pushing them back into their lane) and instead focus my efforts in a more positive way.

1. Say goodbye.

Step one needs to be separating yourself from the negative person. This may be difficult if the negativity is coming from a partner or good friend, but if they are unwilling to change the way they interact there is little you can do to make the situation better. Choosing to not spend time or communicate with them may be the signal they need to help them realize how their attitude is affecting your relationship. 

2. Set your boundaries. 

Everyone has different opinions on this and those opinions usually differ depending on who they're talking about, so don't feel any sort of way if you find yourself disagreeing with yourself. After you've said goodbye and physically separate yourself from the negative person you need to decide whether you want to continue to stay connected through social media.

Nowadays we all post daily life updates and accomplishments across social media, which is great, as long as the people you connect with are genuinely happy for you. Personally, I never block a negative person on social media simply because I like for them to see all that I'm accomplishing despite their opinions. If keeping up to date with their life is too painful though or if they continue to reach out to you through social media, cutting that line of communication may be beneficial.

Related Post: 12 Things It's Okay to Cry About Sometimes

3. Stop analyzing everything. 

How many of us still shower while thinking of comebacks to arguments we had back in the 7th grade? (raises hand) Even though I am all for stepping back from a relationship and taking some time to talk it out, constantly analyzing why someone said or did they things they did is not always beneficial to you. Chances are a negative person is bringing you down for reasons that have to do with them, so leave figuring out why it's happening to them, cause that's not your issue. 

4. Surround yourself with positive people. 

Every time you kick someone out of your life you should pull another person in closer. My friends have helped me get through all my hardest moments, from cross country moves to more heartbreaks that I'm proud to admit. Don't spend all your time thinking about one negative person when you have a community of positive people wishing you nothing but the best. Reach out to friends, new and old, to get you through this difficult phase. 

5. Focus your energy.

I'ma firm believer in channeling your energy and time into a new project whenever you let someone go. My love for blogging actually grew during a time when I had recently been dumped and I needed something to do to keep myself busy. Use all your new found time and energy to start something new, whether that be a hobby, friendship or goal. Having something to works towards every day will give you purpose during those moments when you will inevitably want to cave in and reach out to the person you set out to remove from your life. 




Have you ever had to deal with a negative person in your life? What did you do to help make the situation better?
4

10 Reasons You Should Study Abroad While In College

The ability to attend a four year university is an experience unlike any other. For four years you have the freedoms of adulthood without any of the responsibility. Very few college students know the stress of having to work full time, manage bills and be asked the all too common, "so what's your next step?" Unfortunately not everyone takes advantage of all the opportunities college presents them, which leads to many students all having very similar experiences that will ultimately lead to them graduating with a degree and not much more.

At a time when businesses will let you work with them regardless of your inexperience, students are passing up chances to take internships, volunteer locally and the most amazing of all, travel abroad. While it's not pivotal that you spend a year (or semester) in another country, no one ever comes back regretting the time they spent abroad.



As a two time study abroad participant as well as former employee at my university's study abroad office, I witnessed daily how the months spent oversees benefit students both personally and professionally upon their return.

1. Broaden your knowledge. 

Although I recommend all students, regardless of major, take the opportunity to study abroad, I am especially passionate about people studying in a location that will benefit them academically. Whether you study art, history or the environment, there's a university somewhere that can provide knowledge and experiences that your campus cannot.

2. The perfect icebreaker. 

I cant count the number of times my time abroad has been a topic of discussion during a job interview, whether brought up due to it being on my resume or naturally throughout the course of the conversation. Your time spent learning and traveling is not only relatable to many, but much more interesting than the everyday facts people swap when they first meet.

3. Learn a new language. 

The easiest way to learn something quickly is to be thrown into a situation where you'll need the skill. Many of my friends chose to travel to Costa Rica or France, where learning a new language was less about hours spent over a textbook and more about interacting with locals who were happy to introduce them to their native language.

4. Independence is learned. 

While every college student likes to believe that they are 100% independent, especially if they no longer live at home, the truth is many of us are not. Flying thousands of miles away from home will make it harder to drive home to do your laundry or call your mom when you need some help. The distance will teach you how to rely on yourself, which will be more useful than you can imagine once you graduate college and enter the real world.

5. True friendships will emerge. 

This one may or may not be a perk, and I know two years ago I wouldn't agree with what I'm about to say, but studying abroad will teach you who your real friends are. During my time abroad I went out of my way countless times to try to keep in touch with all my friends back home. What I learned after so many unanswered Skype calls and a lonely first few weeks back in the states was that many friends were content with me not being around. Don't be too bummed out though, because between the new friends you make and the ones that stick by your side, you won't be lonely for long.

6. Universities can fund your trip.

Working alongside the study abroad office taught me that many universities have a budget to fund student's trips abroad. Apart from offering grants, scholarships are often available and are much less competitive than ordinary academic scholarships.

7. Opportunity to travel. 

Studying abroad automatically implies you'll be traveling somewhere, but few people know how easy it is to travel from country to country when outside the United States. During my time in the United Kingdom, I spent five weeks backpacking through Europe with nothing more than a train pass. While I don't know too much about travel in South America, Europe makes it very easy and affordable to travel on a budget.

8. Gain work experience. 

Studying abroad doesn't have to be all about taking classes and traveling when you have the chance. There are programs specifically dedicated to give you the opportunity to intern or work while abroad. While many study abroad programs that focus on the environment and science offer volunteer opportunities, there is a rise in popularity for colleges of business and technology to offer exchange programs that include the chance to intern/work abroad in a related field.

9. Expand your social network. 

Studying abroad will introduce you to multiple new communities. You'll form friendships with students at your new university, bonds with peers who are also going abroad, as well as having the opportunity to network with past alumni from the same university you once attended. A few months abroad will leave you with a lifetime of friends and peers to count on later in life.

10. Once in a lifetime experience. 

I know, I know, all of your friends who have studied abroad say the experience changed their life and won't shut up about how it changed their perspective on life. The thing is, they're not lying. I cant possibly write out how  studying abroad makes you thankful for everything you have while simultaneously leaving you always wanting for more. If you have the opportunity, take it, I promise you wont regret it.



If you've studied abroad, what was the most valuable thing you got out of it? And if you haven't, where is your dream destination and why?
9

20 Honest Reasons Why It's Sometimes Better to Be Single

If you would have asked me what I'd be doing for Valentine's Day two months ago I would have probably talked about the trip I was planning or some romantic dinner I had attended. Then the universe decided to throw me a curveball that led to me being dumped on the street on New Years Day. Luckily my efforts to make 2016 the best year yet have paid off, which is why I had such an incredible Valentine's Day, boyfriend or not.

This year was spent without an official boyfriend but then again not alone. Our relaxed night in shifted from painting, to discussing all of our issues with this season of the Walking Dead, to spontaneously ordering two heart shaped pizzas because one was just not enough. Once I said goodbye to my date for the night I realized how content I was in my current situation. With the freedom to spend my time as a like but the company of another person when needed.

So after I cleaned up the plates and gave my cat Max his special Valentine's Day treat (one extra large can of cat food), I climbed into my bed and created this list of reasons why sometimes we should all pause and be thankful we're single, not only on Valentine's Day, but any day.







1. More space in your life. 

Extra space to enjoy in your bed, on the couch and around the bathroom sink every morning. Enjoy the room to stretch your arms out.

2. Dressing for yourself. 

No more worrying about if your boyfriend will not like your outfit or his opinion about it at all. You can now buy a cute dress because you love the way you look in it, regardless of what anyone else thinks.

3. Become reliant on yourself. 

Ordinary things that need fixing like lightbulbs and wobbly tables become your responsibility, and with a little patience you are totally capable of handing anything that comes your way.

Related Post: Questions You Will Google in Your Twenties

4. Saving money becomes easier. 

Holidays become so much more affordable when you aren't trying to find the perfect gift, plus having to only purchase movie tickets, dinners and concert tickets for one means you basically save 50% on everything!

5. Grooming is now optional. 


Let's be honest for a second, shaving your legs sucks, shaving down there is downright hell. Save money and time by saying goodbye to razors for a little while, cause skipping that step in the shower is so freaking liberating.

6. Make less sacrifices. 
Relationships lead to having to compromise on what Netflix show you watch at night, which restaurant to order takeout from and how to spend your weekend. Not having to figure out a happy medium is so rewarding and definitely one of the best benefits.

Related Post: 12 Things It's Okay to Cry About Sometimes

7. Spend more time with friends. 

Unfortunately most of us give up time with our friends to spend more time with our signifiant others. While there's nothing wrong with that there's definitely something to be said about those friends who welcome us back once our relationships end. Take time to remind those people how much they mean to you.

8. Bloating is no big deal. 

When you're in a relationship there's a chance you might have to take your clothes off in front of somebody, which can be hard to do when you spent your day eating a party size bag of Doritos. Single you can eat all she wants and not have to worry about it, let it all hang out girl!

9. Netflix finally gets you. 

Sharing a Netflix account means their likes muddy up your recommendations. Without someone watching a bunch of shows on your account your recommendations will be all about what you like. No more of being constantly asked if you wanna watch Top Gear, hint, I dont.

10. Become your own biggest fan. 

The other day I seriously walked past my full length mirror, took two steps back and said, "damn girl, those new pants look good on you!" When all you have is yourself, you have to become your own biggest fan, no shame in that.

11. Boundaries are a thing of the past. 

When there's a boy at your apartment you have to pretend to be a normal human being. Once you're alone you are free to pee with the door open, pluck your eyebrows while watching tv and brush your teeth while simultaneously looking for your keys.

12. Nobody wants to spend time with potential in laws. 

No matter how nice they may be, it always feel like a job interview. Not having to go to monthly dinners is such a relief, plus you never have to hear about what a catch they think their son is.

13. You can finally admit how crappy their friends are. 

If you were unlucky enough to date a guy with terrible friends, I'm so sorry, I totally feel for you. The idea of never having to spend time with them again should lift you up though, because we can all agree they're not as funny as they think they are.

14. Everyone you know is kind to you.

Being in a relationship where your partner insults you is the hardest type to get over, which is why it's so important you leave before you grow numb to the words. Enjoy the fact that nobody is bringing you down on a daily basis and that those around you only think the best of you.

Related Post: Why You Should Never Call A Woman Crazy

15. Getting ready to go out is no longer a race. 

The fact that guys enjoy when a girl get's ready for a night out but cant just fucking sit and watch tv while we do it blows my mind. When you're single you can take your time getting ready, Beyonce blaring in the background and all.

16. Keep up with your favorite shows. 

Anyone in a long term relationship will understand the struggle of trying to keep up with a show you both love. One partner is always busier than the other, or isn't in the mood to watch it, or is still one episode behind. When you're single you can finally keep up with the show without having to worry about giving out any spoilers.

17. Secret single girl behavior. 

There is no greater joy than doing all the things you can only do when home alone for an extended period of time. Staring at your pores, plucking your eyebrows, and all that other crap that we have to do but can only do it in the privacy of our homes.

18. Laundry day is so much easier.

Having to only wash your clothes is a a blessing. No more of someones t-shirts "accidentally" falling into the hamper.

19. Take the time to think. 

When you're in a relationship you're so busy in it that it leaves little time to step back and look at what is happening. Once single you can use the time to see where things went wrong and what you can do next time to make sure nothing like that ever happens again.

Related Post: 100 Things to Do Instead of Calling Your Ex Boyfriend

20. Daily happiness will increase. 

If you are fresh out of a relationship this will take a bit, but I guarantee within two weeks you will notice yourself smiling more and being more excited for the day. Relationships end because they're not going well, which is why when you become single it's not all that bad after taking some time to heal.



What's your favorite thing about being single, and if you're in a relationship, what's the one thing you always do when you get a moment to yourself?

1

10 Valentine's Day Cards for Every Guy in Your Life

Whether you like it or not, Valentine's Day is all about chocolates, greeting cards and the immense pressure to have someone special to spend the day with. But what's a girl to do when she's fresh out of a relationship and has temporarily sworn of all men? Except Detective Stabler because he can do no wrong.

Even though I love typical Valentine's Day posts about date ideas, gift guides and ways to celebrate if you're single, I wanted to create something for the women who will be sitting at home, binge watching Law and Order SVU while refreshing their ex's Facebook, Instagram and Twitter page just in case he posts something. He better not though.

Then I had one of those moments, you know the kind, when you have one funny thought and next thing you know it's grown into this awesome idea that you drop everything for to make it a reality! Three days later and a lot of hard work, I created something I hope you all will love, Valentine's Day cards for all the guys in your life. Exes included.

Related Post: 10 Ways to Celebrate Valentine's Day Single 



Even though you cant actually purchase any of them you can at least giggle while thinking about the face they'd make opening up any of these brutally honest greeting cards.

For the cute boy on the bus looking for a seat.


For the handsome guy at the grocery store.

For your best guy friend.

For the guy who broke your heart too many times.

For the guy who just gets you.

For your friend with benefits who you just might be falling for.

For the guy who doesn't enjoy PDA.

For the guy who wanted to change you.

For the guy who loves you despite your baggage.

For the guy who cheated on you. Bastard.



If you're spending Valentine's Day without someone special this year throw out that negativity and remember that you are enough. So maybe we don't have dates or a bouquet of flowers, but we also don't have a boy hurting our feelings and making us feel less than what we are, which is flawless. If you need a person to bitch with or just someone else to stalk online, you can find me on Twitter and Instagram. I promise to not post inspirational quotes that make you wanna roll your eyes into next week.


I'd love to hear in the comments below which card you'd love to send to someone this Valentine's Day. Also, if you can spot where each quote is from, we can officially become best friends now. 
11

12 Things It's Okay to Cry About Sometimes

I am a very emotional person. No matter the feeling, I am most likely crying. I cry when I'm happy, sad, angry and especially when I'm tired. The scene in Alice in Wonderland where she literally cries herself a river really resonated with me as a child and can basically sum up my emotional state of mind anytime a boy hurts my feelings.

Now don't get me wrong, I don't spend my entire day crying, but I definitely don't fight back the tears like some people say I should. 2016 literally started off with my being dumped on the corner of a busy street in Chinatown, transitioned into me realizing I needed to live for me, and ever since has been shifting between me being a strong independent woman and a woman on the verge of tears in the pet aisle in Target. More on that later.



As a lover of random holidays that make no sense, I like to keep track of random national days throughout the year. During my latest hunt for an obscure holiday, I found that February 11 is Don't Cry Over Spilled Milk Day. While I've never spilled milk and if I did I doubt I would cry, I got to think about other things I'm constantly being told not to cry about. So I did what any blogger would do, grabbed my Mac, threw some Law and Order SVU in the background, and started listing all the irrational things that have made me cry lately. Cause why not?



When you ask the stylist to cut off two inches but instead she takes off six.

Spending 30 minutes waiting for the bus only for it to be so full that it drives by without stopping for you.

Wanting to be a strong independent woman but at the same time not being able to carry the kitty litter container home.

Waiting all day for your lunch break then realizing they got your order completely wrong.

Related Post: 10 Ways Working Full Time Changes Your Life



Losing weight to fit into a pair of pants, then realizing you lost it in all the wrong places and now the pants sag around your butt.

Putting away all the photos of you and your ex and realizing you haven't taken a decent photo without him in over a year.

Spending the day watching a marathon of your favorite TV series, except they skip over your favorite episode.

Sit through a 40 second YouTube add but the video buffers for so long and the page refreshes. Then another 40 second YouTube ad appears.



Your cat walks up to you without being asked and sits on your lap.

Finally finding enough money to buy something from the vending machine only to press the wrong button.

Spending 40 minutes straightening your hair, doing your makeup and being ready to slay the day. Walk outside and realize it's pouring rain and the wind just blew away any chance of you looking semi decent.

Not sharing your blog posts all day long on social media, gaining a bunch of new followers anyways!



What's the most random thing you've ever cried about? Happy or sad, I wanna know!
10

8 Popular Reasons You Weren't Called for an Interview

After spending hours writing the perfect resume and even more online job searching, you finally find the position that looks as if it was written for you. You read the job requirements and know you meet every single one, you have just enough experience without having too much and luckily they're still accepting applications.

After submitting the application you get the immediate "we will contact you once we start the review process" email. No worries, they need time to look at applications and get back to you. A week passes and you don't think much of it, then two weeks goes by. After a while you start to wonder if they even looked at your application, or worse, if they saw it and hated it.



Unsure of why they never contacted you leaves you wondering what you could have done different, and without any feedback, you're likely to make the same mistakes again. My first job in the city involved helping unemployed citizens apply and follow up with employers. Now working closely with the human resources department at my current job, I've learned what aspects of a person's job application leads to someone never being contacted for that much wanted interview.

You didn't follow directions. 

Hiring managers have to sort through dozens, sometimes hundreds, of applications of people who are all qualified in one way or another. An instant way to get your application tossed in the 'no' pile is by not following the directions that make their job easier. If they ask for a cover letter, send one. If they want a one page resume, don't give them a single line extra. Follow the directions like your life depends on it, because your professional life does.

You didn't follow up. 

Many job postings feature the line "please no phone calls," but that doesn't mean you aren't allowed to email the hiring manager to follow up on your application. If the company makes no mention about not wanting to be contacted, don't be shy about reaching out and asking to know where they are the in hiring process. Many times, this let's employers know you are still interested in the job.

You didn't fit the job requirements. 

While many of us would like to think we are experts at everything, chances are there's a lot we once knew how to do but wouldn't have the first clue how to do now. In my case, Excel. Sure I can open a spreadsheet and Google my questions to get a job done, but I'm no expert. Take a serious look at how well you really fit the need.

Related Post: 6 Popular Resume Mistakes to Avoid

You were filtered out by application software. 

Unfortunately employers today are faced with so many applications that they have turned to software to make looking through applications more efficient. Computers scan through cover letters and resumes, identifying those that mention key words and choosing those which will be seen by the employer. If your resume and cover letter are not tailored for the job you are applying to, chances are they will be filtered out because of the lack of specific key words.

You made basic grammar and spelling mistakes. 

The job market is just too competitive for you to be making simple mistakes like this, which is why it's so important to review your resume before submitting and have another person look it over as well. One typo is understandable, multiple typos get annoying really fast. Give yourself a chance and triple check before submitting.

You didn't explain job gaps. 

Taking a few months to explore your options is understandable, but long gaps in your employment history raise red flags for employers. If you spent that time volunteering or taking courses, mention that in your resume, or better yet, your cover letter. Don't wait until an interview to explain a long absence, make it known that you were actively job seeking and expanding your skills.

Related Post: 6 (More) Popular Resume Mistakes to Avoid

Your cover letter was generic. 

A cover letter is an opportunity to tell an employer why you are the best candidate for the job, which is why providing a generic cover letter is a disservice to yourself. Expand on your most applicable job experience and relate that experience to what you can offer to improve the organization. A great cover letter gives an employer a glimpse into what you are capable of and should leave them wanting to learn more, maybe during an interview?



What's your biggest struggle when it come to finding a new job? Do you focus your energy on creating a great resume, cover letter or preparing for interviews?

3

The Ultimate Valentine's Day Gift Guide for Single Girls

Raise your hand if you enjoy giving gifts more than you enjoy receiving them! *raises hand* Maybe it's just me but what I love most about Christmas and Valentine's Day is taking the time to find an item that the most important people in my life will cherish, which is why it's so annoying when you don't have a significant other to express your love through during the holidays.

Gift giving doesn't have to be reserved for the people you swap spit with though, single people need love too, which is why I decided to stray away from the typical gift giving guide and create a collection of items that will be perfect to treat yourself with this Valentine's Day. And if you're bestie has really been there for you lately, maybe grab her one too. 


Massage

Do I even need to explain why you deserve a massage? I didn't think so. 

Mani + Pedi

I'm convinced that if I start wearing sandals and sundresses the universe will take notice and bring summer sooner. Become a part of my cause and treat yourself to a bright colored manicure and pedicure. 

Lingerie

Walking around Forever 21 last week I passed the cutest bralette, then my brain cut me off and said, "and who are you trying to look cute for?" My brain is a bitch sometimes. Don't not buy yourself cute things just because you don't have a guy in your life. Buy yourself that bralette girl, then give yourself the compliment you deserve every time you see yourself in it. 

Visit the salon

Does anyone past the age of 10 get regular haircuts anymore? Or are we all on the same page about stylists not understanding that one inch means one inch? Find someone you trust and give your ends a much needed trim, and if you're feeling bold, try out that hair color you've been pinning all over your Pinterest boards. 


Something to boost your mood

I like spending my money on things I can see and enjoy daily, which is probably why I'll never become a foodie. Treat yourself to something that will brighten up your living space, whether that be a new bedspread or that rug you've been eyeing for months.

Related Post: 10 Ways to Celebrate Valentine's Day Single

Staycation

You most likely don't have the money to drop on a full on vacation right after the holidays, but what's stopping you from enjoying everything your city has to offer. Grab a friend or just yourself, rent a hotel room and enjoy all that your city has to offer. Even the smallest of towns have a few places you wouldn't want to live without. 

New clothes

Remember what I said about you deserving that bralette, same goes for that romper that you have no idea where you're going to wear it but damn it you need to buy it now! Okay maybe that's especially specific to me, but you get the point. Go out, buy yourself one fabulous new thing, then plan out somewhere you can wear your cute new outfit. 


Something to make you feel beautiful

Every day I thank my lazy tendencies because they have saved me so much money in life. I can't explain why makeup is so expensive, but I'm sure there's one palette, lipstick, foundation you've been wanting to try. Just for today, splurge on yourself and just buy the freaking thing!

Concert tickets

So many amazing artists are going on tour this year, don't miss out on a night of fun because you rather buy a coffee every morning on your way to work. Staying in just a few nights a month should help you save enough to buy pretty decent seats at any large concert. 

An actual camera

While I love the convenience of the camera on my iPhone, the photos I take with my Polaroid camera are somehow 10x more special than anything on my photo roll. If you rather stay digital, there's some pretty inexpensive options available nowadays that will give you better quality than your phone ever could. 



Are you guilty of only celebrating the holiday when you have a significant other? What are your plans for Valentine's Day this year?
10

10 Ways to Celebrate Valentine's Day Single

How do I always find myself single on Valentine's Day? Seriously though. It's like I'm cursed to only have a boyfriend during the months that aren't about gifts and grand gestures. Fucking shit. Well here I am once again, single as a dollar bill on the national day of love. Or chocolate, however you choose to celebrate.

Just because you're single doesn't mean you can't enjoy the holiday, and no, you're celebrations don't have to begin on the 15th when Target discounts all the cute stuff you've been dying to buy. There's plenty of ways to be single and enjoy Valentine's Day, whether you're flying solo or gathering up all your other chronically alone friends. And if you're still feeling down, just think about all the money you're saving on both gifts and razors this holiday season. Cha ching!


Treat yourself! 

Or a friend too! Just because you're not in a relationship doesn't mean you can't use the day to get a message, manicure, pedicure, or all of the above. Check Groupon to take advantage of the amazing deals that local businesses offer. 

Skip dinner, just order dessert. 

Not only will trying to get dinner reservations feel impossible, prices are guaranteed to be way higher than usual. Instead opt to just order dessert at your favorite place or go somewhere you usually couldn't afford. Grabbing a friend or two will make it feel less awkward, plus give you someone to distract you from all the couples.

Host a Galentine's Day party!

Skip the sitting alone part and host a get together for all your single friends, ladies only though! Have everyone bring some food, throw on your best playlist and sit around discussing whatever the hell you want. Whether it's why your ex will never stop being a child or your thoughts on Nene coming back to the Atlanta housewives. Bonus points if you manage to get a pinata.

Watch some good ol' television. 

Thank god that I was born in the 90s because I can't imagine having to survive without cable TV. What did people with no plans do in the 1700s? And don't tell me they read, cause there was once a time even books weren't accessible. Skip all the drama and stay home with your favorite TV show, just stay away from romantic comedies. I don't think it's a coincidence that The Walking Dead mid season premiere is airing on Valentines Day, the perfect show for someone fresh out of a relationship. 

Attend happy hour.

Newsflash, you're not the only single person on the planet, even though sometimes it can really feel that way. Get out of your comfort zone and go out for a drink on Valentines Day! With restaurants most likely having amazing drink specials, this is a great way to get out of the house and be around a bunch of other people in your same situation. 

Celebrate with your true love.

There's only one thing in this planet that loves us unconditionally, and no it's not our moms. Your pet! Who else will cuddle you even after you totally forget to feed them and leave the TV on while you're at work. Take your dog for a walk and have a photo shoot with your cat. Even though they probably will forget to buy you a gift they're company is all you need.

Call a friend.

Just because you're alone on Valentine's Day doesn't mean you have to be alone on Valentine's Day. Who better to lean on than your best friend? If he or she is busy, reach out to that friend you always mean to talk to but can never seem to get a hold of. Catching up with an old friend is a great reminder of how much you have to be thankful for.

Book a trip.

I can guarantee you won't be thinking about the lack of chocolate boxes you wont be receiving if you're busy exploring a new city. Take advantage of the low airfare in February and visit a place you've always wanted to. Groupon has great deals on accommodations and things to do, and if you can afford to take off somewhere new, have a staycation and be a tourist in your own city for a day.

Get some exercise. 

In the words of Elle Woods, "Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people just don't shoot their husbands, they just don't." While most of us don't have a husband to shoot, yet, we can all benefit from a natural mood booster. If your resolution was to lose x amount of pounds or finally start a healthy lifestyle, think of Valentine's Day as a fresh start to reaching your goals for the new year.

Mail out Valentine's Day cards. 

Remember elementary school when your parents would drive you to the store to pick up some awesome Valentine's Day cards. Innocent you would write one out for everyone in your class, even the girl who had a fly in her hair that one day and ever since then she creeped you out. You were all in it together you know? When did we all decide to stop being kind to the people in our lives? Cause I want to walk into work and find two dozen Disney themed cards with lollipops and stickers! Go back to simpler times and mail out your closest friends adult versions of a Valentine's Day card, or not, kid cards have gotten about 100x cooler. 



How are you celebrating Valentine's Day this year? Plus if you're single, share a way you prefer to celebrate this day of the year! 

5

How to Enjoy the Super Bowl When You Hate Football

I don't think it's a big surprise to anyone that I'm not a football fan. I mean, have you met me? Probably not, okay, bad example. Football and I, actually sports and I, have never really been best of friends. In school I was never invested in who won the basketball game. It was gym, Jessica needed to fucking relax and remember it was just a game. Plus, with athletes making more money than I ever will for running after a ball, I'm sorry, I'm just not a fan.



Except there's one thing I do love, being included. Do I know what the score is? No. Could I even tell you what the team names are? Probably not. But dammit you better invite me to your viewing party! It's not like I plan to sit around and ask a million questions, I'm mainly there for the chips and drinks anyways.

If you're trying to decide whether or not to go to a super bowl party, I say go. Yeah there's probably a Law and Order SVU marathon on but that happens every weekend. Don't miss out on the fun because you have no clue what's happening and are completely uninvested in who wins. There's plenty of ways to have fun without being a die hard fan.

Focus on the food.

I can't be the only one creating Pinterest boards with footbal themed snack foods, right? Spend your time dipping strawberries in chocolate and creating a snack stadium. And if you're not talented in the kitchen, focus your efforts on consuming all the food you can. Apart from Thanksgiving, this is the one other day a year where you can eat everything in sight and not be judged. Just call it stress eating cause you're so upset by the score.

Bingo, anyone?

Have trouble keeping up with the game? Introduce something that will give you an incentive to pay attention, like super bowl bingo. Pinterest has some great premade templates and if you offer a prize to the winner, people (including you) will be a lot more motivated to keep up with what's happening on the TV screen.

Place a bet.

The best way to care about the outcome of the game is if you've invested some money into it. Sarah over at Venus Trapped in Mars published an awesome post of a game I've never heard of. And with directions even my cat could understand, I'm definitely going to twist some arms to get my friends to play this year.

Watch for the halftime show.

You'd be lying if you said you didn't know who was performing at the halfitme show, unless you live under a rock. A rock that somehow doesn't receive cell reception. Spend some time before the game catching up on all the performer's biggest hits so that when they do hit the stage, you can use that moment to wow everyone with your trivia. No it's not about football, but whatever.

Enjoy the commercials. 

Anyone who has spent a lifetime of trying to get into sports know that the commercials are the only thing that will be talked about long after people stop arguing over who the real winner should have been. Sit back and wait for the minutes pass while until the next commercial that probably paid millions of dollars to be aired. I mean for that much money, they can have my attention.

Research some lines.

Don't want to sit around silently for hours? Want to participate in the conversation but don't know how? I've got you covered. Choose a side, find someone who knows their shit on that same side, then watch and learn. When he or she yells, "Are you kidding me, that was a fumble," take the opportunity to shout, "that was a fumble, seriously?!" Fake it till you make it girl!


Still dreading the idea of watching a bunch of men run back and forth after a ball? Then stay home, please, for everyone's sake. The only thing worse than watching something you're not interested in is trying to enjoy something you love while other's complain about how stupid it is. With most people being at home watching the game, you can take the opportunity to catch a movie, enjoy empty museums and do all those things that are usually full of crowds.



Will you be watching the super bowl this year? What's one thing you look forward to most when it comes to people's super bowl parties?

8

Are You Really Enjoying Your Twenties?

Late last year I took a real look at my website analytics and realized that the vast majority of my daily readers are women age 18-24. Women in their most defining years are checking into my website for advice on resumes, apartment decor and anecdotes that will make them feel just a tiny bit better about not having it all figured out. I think this is absolutely incredible.

In an age where we get so much conflicting information about relationships, what our goals should be and how fast we should be hitting major milestones, I'm happy that I can create a space online where there's no pressure to see the world, put a label on your relationship or get that promotion before you hit 25. Our twenties are the only time in our life when we can have nothing figured out and be totally on track, which is why I've spent the last few days thinking about whether or not I'm really enjoying being a twenty something.

Related Post: Lies People Tell You About Being in Your Twenties


Don't get me wrong, I love my life, but having the world at my feet can be a bit overwhelming when all I want is a cute boy to text me he misses me and a box of pizza on my lap. My most recent break up taught me a lot about myself, mainly that I'm way too flexible when it comes to making other people happy. At a time when articles are telling me I need to be selfish and explore my options, my mind is telling me to focus on one guy, one career path, one Netflix series.

If you caught my post about my word for the year, you'll know that I'm focusing my energy this year on forming a community. Finding a group of people to uplift you can be hard though when were told we need to focus on ourselves at this point in our life. Except I think everyone has it wrong, who needs guidance, tons of second opinions and someone to sometimes just tell them what to do more than a confused twenty something??

Back to my question, I think this weekend I finally found the answer I was trying to avoid. No. I am not enjoying my twenties, at least not as much as I could be.

Related Post: Questions You Will Google in Your Twenties

This has nothing to do with the fact that I don't drink or go out often. My satisfaction really doesn't even have to do with my lack of friends in the city, though a good group of friends would help. Even when I was madly in love I wasn't enjoying my weekends to the fullest. Fun means something different to everyone, and I've finally come full circle to realize that my idea of fun is giving in to all those things I used to wish I could do. 

Eighteen year old me would have killed to be able to go to a concert on a Monday night. Too bad I was too young and too broke. Twenty year old me dreamed of packing a bag and flying somewhere for the weekend, but again, too broke. Now into the better part of my twenties, I have all the resources, yet lack the motivation. So along with my drive to perservere towards all my goals this year, I plan to also take the leap and just do all those fun things I always read about but never go out and experience. 

Not to sound selfish or preachy but 2016 will be the year of me. Starting with my blog, my needs for great local friends and my want to not just live for the weekend. And speaking of not living for the weekend, just this Monday I attended the Muse and X Renegades concert. It was incredible. Eighteen year old me would be very proud that not only did I have money for pretty stellar seats, but that I was able to stay out past 11 o'clock on a school night.



Are you a twenty something wondering if you're making the most of this decade? And if so, what are you doing to enjoy the moment more?

6

100 Things to Do Instead of Calling Your Ex Boyfriend

Breakups are fucking hard, and there's no nicer way of putting it. And why should there be? Breakups in life mean you probably haven't showered in days, your eyes are swollen shut from the amount of crying you've been doing and your days are a seemingly endless cycle of shouting how much of a strong independent woman you are and sobbing about how much you're going to miss him.

The hard part about going through a break up in your twenties isn't the fact that everyone is starting to ask you when you're going to get married. Try dealing with that shit on top of sitting at home all day. Alone. With no one to yank the phone out of your hand every time you wanna call your ex and ask him why he couldn't just try to work it out.

Sure, best friends can visit so you can roam the aisles of Target all afternoon, but eventually you're going to go home and that empty side of the bed and bottle of wine will convince you that you need to call him to let him know just how much of an asshole he is. Don't do it though, because at the end of the call, it'll be you feeling like an asshole.




My entire love for writing began when my post on how to get over a guy went viral. Yeah, a post I wrote at 3am in tears somehow blew up and to this day sits on the first page of Google. Which is equal parts awesome and embarrassing. And fresh of the bathroom floor I'm back with 100 things to do to keep you from calling your ex. Because you're better than that, and he deserves to step on a rusty nail. Repeat after me, "fuck that guy."


1. Call your best friend.

2. Call your old roommate.

3. Call your mom.

4. Call literally anyone who will answer the phone.

5. Get a haircut. But nothing too crazy that you’ll regret later.


6. Dance to an entire Beyoncé album.

7. Realize you can’t dance and instead switch to a Taylor Swift album.

8. Belt out Adele’s entire album, in tears, preferably while using a remote as a microphone.

9. Sort through all the photos in your phone.


10. Go cry in front of the mirror. It’s weird but also kinda therapeutic.

11. Cook something since you probably haven’t eaten in a while.

12. Clean your apartment.

13. Clean the parts of your apartment you always skip. You know what I’m talking about.

14. Go to the store, any store. Just get some air.


15. Go grocery shopping, you could probably use some healthy foods.

16. Watch an episode of a show you absolutely love.

17. Write all your feelings down in a journal entry. Or email draft, whatever.

17. Organize your music library.

18. Watch a YouTube video.


19. Try to get through a Blogilates video.

20. Or visit the gym!

21. Take yourself to a movie. Trust me, no one cares you’re there alone. If anything, they’re impressed by your lack of needing someone to come with you.

22. Clean out your inbox. Life’s too stressful already without having 2000 unread emails.

23. Waste time on Pinterest. That’s an immediate hour gone.

24. Try one of those YouTube makeup tutorials. How the hell do those 14 year olds apply eyeliner so perfectly?!


25. While you’re doing your makeup, go full ultimate grand supreme and try a hair tutorial.

26. Clean out your closet and toss anything you don’t love.

27. Take your dog for a walk.

28. Or for all my cat ladies out there, brush your cat!

29. Block your ex from your Facebook newsfeed.


30. Or go the extra mile and block them on all social media. Status updates are only gonna bring you down, and you don't need that negativity in your life.

31. Find new music with Spotify.

32. You should probably do your laundry. It’s time girl.

33. Go for a walk, literally anywhere.

34. Pack away all the things that remind you of your ex.


35. Take a shower.

36. Start a blog!

37. Find a new hobby.

38. Join Meetup.com

39. Put together a bath. Like a legit one where you can take a photo of your legs in the bubbles.


40. Make a break up playlist.

41. Read one of your old favorite books.

42. Flip through all your old magazines.

43. Clean out your purse.

44. Clean out your junk drawer.


45. Turn off your breakup playlist and make a strong independent woman playlist.

46. Scroll through Tumblr.

47. Think about planning a weekend vacation.

48. Go buy some plants for your home.

49. Go to your favorite hangout spot.


50. Create a new outfit with clothes you already own.

51. Watch a comedy special on Netflix.

52. Buy tickets to a show you’ve always wanted to see.

53. Begin watching a new TV series.

54. Paint something.


55. Spend an entire day watching Law and Order SVU. Nothing mends a broken heart like watching Olivia Benson catch bad guys.

56. Drown yourself in inspirational quotes. Pinterest and Instagram are a gold mine for quotes to boost your mood.

57. Listen to a podcast.

58. Treat yourself to a manicure or pedicure.

59. Focus on your schoolwork instead.


60. Write down all the reasons you can’t stand him. It sounds childish but it’s important to not idealize the relationship.

61. Join something! A team, organization or book club.

62. Find something cute to Instagram. It sounds vain but it’ll keep you busy and the likes will boost your ego.

63. Change your ex’s contact name.

64. Find a video game to play.


65. Drink an entire glass of water, or wine, your choice.

66. Fill out surveys online.

67. Rearrange your furniture. This will help your space feel more like your own, which helps if you once lived together.

68. Pluck your eyebrows.

69. Go buy one of your old favorite magazines. Does anyone remember reading Cosmo Girl and Jane Magazine?


70. Invest in a new bra, because your boobs deserve it.

71. Learn the choreography to one of your favorite music videos. This will take you all day, which is kind of the point.

72. Actually follow through on those Pinterest projects you pin.

73. Dye your hair.

74. Spend some time reading about other people’s breakups. Shit could be a lot worse dude.

75. Go bowling.


76. Revert back to being 12 and dance around in your underwear to Hilary Duff, or whoever you were obsessed with.

78. Floss, because you probably need to anyways.

79. Clean out your text messages. They suck up storage space and are full of messages from your ex.

80. Clean out the photos on your laptop. Do you really need all 900 photos of your cat? (yes)

81. Delete any apps that you don’t use anymore. You need the storage space for all the new numbers you’ll be getting! (positive thinking guys)


82. Brunch is always a good idea, especially if it’s the weekend.

83. Have you updated your phone to the new iOS? Probably not right?

84. Your computer probably has updates you’ve been avoiding for weeks too.

85. Go find your perfect shade of lipstick.

86. Work on updating your resume.

87. Watch your favorite childhood film. Enjoy catching all those jokes six year old you never caught.


88. Watch a horror movie, because the last thing you need right now is to watch a romantic comedy.

89. Grab one of those adult coloring books and see what the hype is all about.

90. Bake something.

91. Clean out your downloads folder.

92. Sort through all your bookmarks. The internet ones. Does anyone still have physical bookmarks?


93. Play with your pet. The only thing on this planet that will love you unconditionally, even when you forget to feed them.

94. Private all your old/embarrassing Facebook profile photos. Nobody needs to see what 2008 version of you looked like.

95. Scroll through your Facebook posts from years ago. It’s weird how many pointless updates we used to post.

96. Not in love with your job? Check out who’s hiring.

97. Visit that coffee shop you always pass by but never go inside.


98. Choose the thing you’ll say to your ex in case you ever run into him.

99. Find an arcade in your city. They’re cheap and fun.

100. If all else fails, search funny cat videos on the internet.


Are you a twenty something or millennial in need of support, advice, or sometimes just a second opinion? If your answer is yes, click to join Surviving Our 20s, where you can connect with others who are also adulting the best they can! Joining is FREE and the relationships you can build are priceless.


4
Back to Top