30 Thoughts Every Girl Has While Thanksgiving Shopping

Most years I don't celebrate Thanksgiving because I'm an incredibly picky eater who rather order a pizza than have to deal with cleaning up the mess afterwards. Having not been home for Thanksgiving for the past five years, I've almost forgotten what dishes you traditionally find on the table. This year my boyfriend and I are both away from family for the holiday, so I decided to be the strong independent woman I know I can be and cook a dinner for two. Well, shout orders at my boyfriend until I get frustrated and just do it all myself.

Before all that fun can happen I had to go shop for the ingredients, and again, I'm a picky eater who hasn't celebrated the holiday in years. This is what happened...

1. Okay, I'm doing this. I have a grocery list and the power of Pinterest to pull this off.

2. Let's get the most important stuff first, turkey and potatoes. 

3. How many servings of roasted potatoes can I eat? The limit does not exist. 

4. Five pounds should do. 

5. I can't buy a whole turkey, no way I'm sticking my hand in that thing. 

6. Why the fuck is a turkey breast 10 dollars more than a whole turkey? How does that make any sense?

7. Let it go and just buy the smallest one, we're not fisting a turkey this year. 

8. Shit, I have to season this thing. Oh look, they placed the seasonings right next to them for idiots like me.

9. I still have no idea which one to buy. I'll just use use the lemon pepper I put on my chicken.

10. Have to buy gravy, but I hate gravy, except all my guests will be expecting it. 

11. Ugh, does this mean I'm going to have to make this gravy?

12. Mashed potatoes, a staple at any Thanksgiving dinner. 

13. I'll just buy boxed ones, they're still Idaho potatoes apparently. 

14. Okay, I'm pretty much satisfied with what I have. 

15. Shit, all I have are meat and potatoes. Need sides!

16. Asparagus looks like an easy thing, let's grab a bunch of that.

17. I don't think I've ever technically ate asparagus. Do you boil it or....?

18. Pies! I'll bake a pie! I'll be the modern day Snow White, minus the 7 filthy roommates.

19. How do pies require so many ingredients?! Fuck it, I'll just buy one the day before and say I made it.

20. Okay what else, what the hell do people eat on Thanksgiving?

21. Cranberry sauce, I swear I've seen that in an episode of Friends.

22. Where do they keep the cranberry sauce?! Forget it, someone can bring that with them. 

23. Okay this is already like 60 dollars in groceries, maybe my dinner can be like bring your own side.

24.God these lines are so long, does nobody have a job?!

25. I've already spent way too much money, stop scanning things!

26. Okay, that wasn't so bad, now I just have to carry all this home. 

27. I feel like my arms are going to fall off.

28. Craaap, I forgot the most basic thing! The damn tray for the turkey.

29. Also I only own two plates.

30. Now I have to go all the way back tomorrow.

Are any of you cooking Thanksgiving dinner tomorrow? Let me know in the comments below what you're most worried you'll burn in the oven or your full proof signature dish! I may or may not still need some ideas for side dishes.

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  1. I haven't been home for the past 5 Thanksgivings too, but I've been getting adopted into different families, hehehe. I'm definitely not a fan of the clean up either, but I'm helping with cooking tomorrow! If it's a group effort, it's not quite so bad? :D?

    1. YES, the more people the better! Especially when it comes to all the dishes afterwards. All through college I just randomly invited myself to other people's Thanksgiving dinners, it wasnt so bad, most people were too busy eating to notice the one random person there lol

  2. we've hosted thanksgiving ONCE and it was so crazy i vowed never again!!

    happy thanksgiving!