My Secret Weapon to Finding Love Online

My boyfriend texts a girl named Anastasia at least once per day. He's been talking to her for months and I don't see him stopping in the near future. He regularly checks up how her day is going and asks if she wants anything from the grocery store while he's there. It would bother me more if not for one thing, Anastasia is me.

You're probably like thinking you've stumbled upon some weird ass post where I'm about to give way too many details about my double life, or our love for role play or some TMI shit like that. That's not what's happening, I wouldn't do that to you. What I will do is let you in on the thing I did that helped me date multiple people I met online without running the risk of them knowing anything about me I didn't want them to know. Which is extremely hard in 2017. Okay, here's the story.

About a year ago I came to the realization that I was never going to meet someone who I was compatible to with my current lifestyle. Since lifestyle was a big factor in the type of person I was looking for, I knew that if I was going to find someone similar to myself it was never gonna happen on a Friday night. Unless Mr. Right had a part time job as a pizza deliver boy.

After a night out with my girlfriends I was convinced to try online dating, with just one rule, I needed to remain totally anonymous. Oh, and never Tinder. To make this possible, I made sure to pick a username I've never used, upload a photo that wasn't online anywhere, and the one thing that was a game changer for me, I kept my name a secret. Here's why and how.

What's the first thing you do when you meet someone online? Take every bit of information you have about them and/or their name and research them like a grade depends on it. Sure this is fun, and I'm not against this at all, but I rather not be Googled prior to a date.

No, I don't have any sort of police record or some terribly embarrassing viral video attached to my name, but what I do have are years worth of blog posts, sponsored events and a very public Instagram account that serves as a window into my life. So yeah, I rather not be Googled prior to a first date.

To make this happen, I chose to never give my name to a guy who I wasn't going to realistically meet in person. For guys I did have a first date with, I gave them an alias, and don't worry, I was 100% honest with them about that name not being my actual name. Out of all the guys I talked to, no one had a problem with it, it's not like I was trying to meet them in a dark alley at night.

By keeping my name a secret, I avoided my privacy being invaded by the people I matched with, and somehow managed to create a sense of mystery in an era where people share everything from their trips to the gym to their children's first steps. If a guy was nice enough to go on a second date with, I dropped the fake name and let them know my real first name.

By the end of my online dating journey, a total of two guys learned my actual name, with only my current boyfriend getting a hold of my last name. To this day my boyfriend has me listed in his phone as Anastasia Beaverhausen, which serves as a daily reminder of the out of the box way we found each other. Oh, and he's lazy.

How do you manage dating online without getting searched prior to a date? Also, if you know where the fake name comes from, let me know where I can mail your best friend charm too!

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  1. This is hilarious - I have a blog, a lot of writing on the interwebs AND a public IG account, so I don't love giving out my full name before I meet guys, either. Why should they have the unfair advantage of knowing everything about me when I don't get to know anything about them??

    1. EXACTLY! If I was a normal person then I totally would have no problem with it, but with our large results on Google, I dont want any guy knowing how my trip to Greece in 2012 went!

  2. Anastasia Beaverhausen was Karen from Will & Grace right?

    1. Yessss!! The next show that desperately needs a reboot!!